Bus conversations are amusing.

Sometimes it's nice thinking that, in this crazy world, it's okay to be crazy. Although some people exploit that a little too much, like these bogan school kids having 'philosophical' discussions about good, evil and Harry Potter.

Kid 1: "Yeah, they spread rumours about her being dog ugly."
Kid 2: "How do you spread rumours about someone being ugly? Like, if they're not?

I sat there in the fourth row from the back, trying hard not to crack up. Two minutes later I overheard a girl in red speaking on the phone two rows ahead of me and to the left. She was waving her hands around excitedly, really getting into the conversation.

"I know! It's amazing!" she said. "I've been trying to be more organised!"

She spoke of her attempts and successes for a minute or two, and I tuned out. Five minutes later she was at it again.

"Wait. This is on the SIXTH?" Uh-oh.

Her chirpy 'OMG! Lyk!' voice changed tone instantly.

"SHIT!" she said. "I have a wedding! I'm a BRIDESMAID! I thought it was the first!"

Soon after that, the kids in the back were continuing their deep and meaningful on life, love and sexuality.

Kid1: "So you were joking about asking her out, and now you're going out? But you don't even like her! That's sad!"
Kid2: "I couldn't decide!"

For a while I was under the impression Kid1 had at least a little bit of sense. Anyway, in the next part of their discussion I realised there was a girl sitting quietly with them, occasionally joining in. This is where Harry Potter makes his appearance and, somehow, at least in their minds, becomes mildly pornographic (because rumours, dating, Harry Potter - it's all logical conversation here).

Kid1: "Dumbledore dies in that one, hey? No, he can't, he dies in the Deathly Hollows."
Kid2: "I don't know. I don't really read them. I read the last page."
Kid3: "Yeah, everyone only reads the last page."
Kid2: "Yeah. Harry Potter has sex with a student. That's sad! Who sleeps with his best mate's sister?"
Kid1: "How do you know that?"
Kid2: "Because they had kids!"

Just when I thought it couldn't get more ridiculous, and that maybe Kid1 was at least more sane than Kid2, I was greatly disappointed. I'd began drifting off when conversation peaked once again. This time, it was about their theories of good and evil, and that you can't have good without evil because lions eat deer and cows eat grass and trees eat apple juice -- or something equally ridiculous about 'the chain of life'.

Kid1: "Spirits, they can't hurt you. They can only scare the fucking shit out of you!"
Kid2: "They can't hurt you unless you let them!"

Sigh. Thirteen year olds make me laugh.


Queen Anne said...

Ahhhh at least they are only kids and there terribly concocted bits and pieces of information have been taken from other vague sources... HP had sex with a student... because he had kids with his best friend's little sister... You might not get the "decades later" thing if you're only reading the last page of a book.

ahhhhhh I've been procrastinating... as to not do 1052 T-T Last question... Q2... bah.